I first saw this quote, “Thoughts unsaid then forgotten,” in a black-and-white photograph of a 1973 installation by the Dutch artist Bas Jan Ader. In the photo the words are hand written low on the wall and lit by a common clamp-on lamp affixed to a short tripod; a vase of flowers sits on the floor nearby. This piece has always struck me as extremely sad. I imagine the artist missed his chance to say what he needed to say, then before he got another opportunity, he simply forgot.

It reminds me that however important or insignificant, painful or pleasurable, thoughts unsaid are ephemeral. Despite how weighty they sometimes feel, of their own accord they don’t hang around. Words naturally want to move through our system, unless we cling and attach to them or put effort into remembering them.

Not-saying can be a form of defense or forgetfulness. It can be protective of self and others and either deliberate or unintentional. Not-saying can be a way to gradually reduce the strength of certain words, relaxing their hold on us.

Thoughts unsaid can also be a a way to minimize and dismiss, creating a silence that denies one's own or another person’s reality.

What thoughts of yours want to be said, and what want to be forgotten?